Observations
Man, in general, is driven by two or three things (personal number) that have deeply marked his life. This list can hardly change once a certain age is reached. These memories may or may not have left physical marks, but unfailingly, they have left “indelible” marks in the memory.
Regret and Shame (even self-loathing)
Some are memories for which we would gladly agree to give up life, if that allowed us to return and erase such dark and obscure memories. We regret them so much, or so much we are saddened by them. This can be a significant and even dramatic deviation from our principles of life (abortion, betrayal, bloodshed, rape, abused virginity, physical or moral handicap caused to others, etc.). If the memory can be unbearable for the person who committed the act, it is often more so for the victim.
Anger and Trauma
Indeed, one of the major marks of our life can also take the form of terrifying suffering endured, either due to a despicable act (as mentioned in the previous paragraph), or by an unfortunate combination of circumstances such as the loss of a parent at a young age, the fact of having been a direct or collateral (indirect) victim of a traffic accident, a fire or a certain tragedy.
But while there are difficult feelings, there are also pleasant ones.
Recognition and Respect
There are some people (generally few) whose dedication to our happiness has marked us. Although in many cases it is a parent or spouse, it often happens that it comes from people from whom we did not really expect it (or even from whom we especially did not expect it: true “Samaritans”).
Pride (even Self-congratulation) and Testimony
Finally, and this is perhaps the feeling most sought after by many, there are also sweet and happy memories of the actions we took or of the fruits they produced. And which deep within us gives us the feeling that our life will have been worth living, or which deep within us is proof that we are a certain type of person, because of our noble attitude in a a circumstance which was not at all obvious.
God's Way
If we have tried to list the 04 main strong feelings that a man can experience throughout his life, it is not in a scholarly or demonstrative approach. But it is rather because these moments (which often happened in a matter of seconds, but sometimes also which often led to years of trauma) which have deeply and lastingly marked our lives, are amply described in the Scriptures. God, the All-Knowing, being by nature fully aware of the feelings of our heart, want to restore happiness to us, not by erasing or annihilating our memory, but by restoring to us his peace, his deep peace, whatever our status in our memory (guilty or victim).
From Crimson to Snow: Those for Whom Christ Came
The main character of the New Testament marked by regret is the apostle Paul. He had once persecuted the disciples of Christ. The climax having been reached during the stoning of Stephen which he had approved and in which he had indirectly participated by keeping the clothes of those who put him to death (Acts 22: 20). And if Paul learned to live with this painful memory, it was because he had understood the forgiveness acquired for him by the death of Christ on the cross. And we see in the life of Paul a magnificent illustration of this prophecy of Isaiah (chapter 1: verse 18): “Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.”
For those who are tempted to consider that the case of Paul only concerns people who acted in ignorance (1 Timothy 1: 13), we could add the case of Matthew (i.e. Levi, the tax collector), of which during the call, the Lord Jesus indicated to those who criticized him for eating with sinners, that his saving mission was precisely intended for those who recognized themselves as sinners. Let's read together instead:
“And as he passed by, he saw Levi the son of Alpheus sitting at the receipt of custom, and said unto him, Follow me. And he arose and followed him. And it came to pass, that, as Jesus sat at meat in his house, many publicans and sinners sat also together with Jesus and his disciples: for there were many, and they followed him. And when the scribes and Pharisees saw him eat with publicans and sinners, they said unto his disciples, How is it that he eateth and drinketh with publicans and sinners? When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.”
And we can see how this man, once considered as a traitor to his people because he served the executioner (Roman authority), was transformed to the point of being considered as the author who bequeathed us the superb heritage that is the Gospel bearing his name. . Indeed, both Paul and Matthew could confess the depth of Christ's following words. And we too, following them, can have full faith in them: “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11 : 28-30)
So together let us confess our sins to God the Almighty Father and accept the free Salvation of Christ offered to all those who agree to make Him henceforth the only Lord and Master of their lives. And so from now on we will be safe from the devil's accusations because we will definitely be forgiven. But also through the continued teaching of His Love, God will protect us from committing such crimes again, it is up to us to continually trust Him.
Recovery from “trauma”
We see in the Scriptures many who have experienced trauma of some level. The most emblematic cases being those of Abraham, the father of faith, and Job, the righteous one.
Abraham received God's promise, but it was not immediately manifested. Also beyond the time that had passed since the promise had been made, the Bible reminds us that “And being not weak in faith, he considered not his own body now dead, when he was about an hundred years old, neither yet the deadness of Sara’s womb” (Romans 4:19) Giving birth in these conditions was not easy; but he knew how to keep faith in God rather than resigning himself or accusing God or even fate. And a few years after the Word of God had manifested itself, his ordeal quite “violently” resurfaced, this time reaching the height: This child, manifestation of the promise of God, had to be offered as a sacrifice. Abraham did not get angry with God, he did not accuse him of “making fun of his feelings”, but he obeyed, conceiving in his heart “the impossible” what God had never yet achieved: the resurrection. (Hebrews 11:17-19)
What about Job? he literally made God proud with his dedication, his justice. He will later be counted among the 3 righteous people with Noah and Daniel (Ezekiel 14:14, 20). Men remaining righteous in the midst of the most terrifying adversity. So Job also knew how to remain firm in his devotion to his God.
A mark, may be the most positive that we can particularly note in the lives of these two illustrious predecessors of the Church, is the fact that they knew that their experience, however trying it was, not only did not define their identity, but moreover, was no excuse for not fulfilling their calling: to continue to be blessings to others. Their final acts of bravery were then the last phase preceding their recovery:
- Abraham did not withdraw when God asked him to pray for the house of Abimelech (Genesis 20) which God had struck with barrenness; he obeyed God, although his own wife "remained" sterile, he did not question his vocation as a prophet either by claiming that he had not known how to intercede for his own wife: this was the last episode of his life, after which God in turn blessed his wife.
- Job was still covered with wounds, still had the painful memory of the loss of his possessions and especially his children, when God asked him to pray for these friends with regrettable advice. He did not tell himself that it was rather he who needed God's blessing, nor did he question his ability to be heard by God in view of his own agony; he obeys God: immediately afterwards, God in turn blesses him (Job 42: 7-10).
The measure of recognition
It is certainly a laudable attitude to recognize the dedication of those who have invested remarkably and often tirelessly in our lives. It is legitimate to honor them. And if we do not do it willingly, we must do it out of duty (Mark 7:10-13; 1 Timothy 5:8,16). In most cases this will be our parents (Matthew 7:9-11, Luke 11:11-13), but it could just as easily be other people like the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37).
However, the Lord Jesus Christ strongly warns us against any exploitation that the evil one could make of this initially legitimate affection, so as to make it a trap against our faith. Hence this unequivocal warning from the Lord Jesus Christ, in the 10th chapter of the Gospel of Matthew from which we have just extracted the case concerning loved ones: “Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven. But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven. Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it. He that receiveth you receiveth me, and he that receiveth me receiveth him that sent me. He that receiveth a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet’s reward; and he that receiveth a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man’s reward. And whosoever shall give to drink unto one of these little ones a cup of cold water only in the name of a disciple, verily I say unto you, he shall in no wise lose his reward.” (Matthew 10 :32-42)
We are therefore authorized, encouraged and if necessary instructed to honor all those who have positively marked our existence. However, we must never cross the line into loving them more than God our Creator, honoring them more than the Lord Jesus Christ our Savior, obeying them more than the Holy Spirit, whom God has placed in our hearts . Be careful, God clearly sees the motives of our heart, it is not a question of being unpleasant to prove to ourselves that we love God more than our benefactors. Indeed, the Lord knows when we cherish or rejoice in opposition to an authority under the pretext of faith, but He also knows when we do it because we recognize the Authority of God, as supreme, it is i.e. above any other authority. But if it happens that our motives are confused or mixed, then let us take time before God so that he may purify our heart and, if necessary, our thoughts in order to take the appropriate actions, let us say the words that correspond to the situation; the pure heart and the conscience exempt (pure) from all reproach.
The mark of Testimony
Our greatest reward, after having successfully gone through an ordeal, having accomplished a performance or accompanying a son or godson in achieving a performance, is the feeling of duty accomplished. It is often the feeling, the goal most ardently sought by parents in the education of their children. This feeling, when reached, often serves as a shield for us in the face of certain challenges. But like every good thing God has given us, it must be submitted to the Lordship of Christ for fear of misusing it.
At the height of the ordeal, Job could remember that he had not committed a fault and therefore could not give in to the attempts of the evil one using his friends to overwhelm him by insinuating that his sufferings were the result of his sins. Likewise, it will always happen to us throughout our life of faith that the evil one will seek to convince us of never having truly believed; it is then that the Holy Spirit will awaken in our memory, these events having strongly marked our faith, in order to thus preserve His Peace in our heart.
However, it should be noted that there are indeed two sources of signals in every man’s heart; one being tares, the lie of Satan to lead us to discouragement, despondency, and death; and the other being wheat; the word of the Holy Spirit, to lead us to repentance, restoration and eventually restitution. We therefore inevitably need the Holy Spirit to know the source of any “criticism” that disturbs our peace and therefore have the appropriate reaction.
A word for the youngest
Two unique and diametrically opposed stories are present in the Bible. These are that of Mary the mother of Jesus and that of Mary Magdalene. The first had to be a virgin when she conceived Christ. The second had led a very bad life, but by the Grace of God had been totally transformed after her encounter with Christ Jesus. And both have wonderfully contributed a lot to the Church, each following their calling. (Read the article entitled “The 2 Maries”). Perhaps you have often been amazed when listening to stories of testimony, like that of Mary Magdalene or the Samaritan woman met at the Well, or the prodigal son or the apostle Paul, but unfortunately poorly told by some contemporaries. Because the aim of the testimony is in no way to arouse in those who listen to it the regret of not having also experienced a life of disorder which, after repentance, would have generated a “spectacular” testimony. No, the purpose of testimony is just to demonstrate the Power of God and to wisely expose the dark misfortune of our past life.
What is the point of our approach here? It is simply to say to you: be deeply grateful to the Lord Jesus Christ for the areas of your life where He has preserved you even before your repentance. It could be about your virginity, it could be about never even wishing someone bad, it could be about never having done an act that led to death (neither by accident, nor by voluntary abortion, nor by hatred, nor as a result of burglary) it could be to have never committed dirty tricks (neither in business, nor at work, nor in love, nor in friendship) it could be from never having given in to any form of cheating (academic cheating, corruption, fraud, etc.)
Indeed, for all those who have committed such crimes, there very often remains, even after their repentance, one, two or three things for which they need the discipline of the Holy Spirit to keep the Peace of the Lord within them. For the apostle Paul, the fierce persecution of the Church had probably left a mark on him. Far from wanting to once again trouble those to whom God has already forgiven every fault and sin, the goal of this final paragraph is rather to spare many, especially the youngest, from this type of post-repentance fight: Jealously protect your “virginity” whatever the form. I beseech you in the name of Christ Jesus, protect it!
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